Happy Anniversary?

Tuesday, June 5, 2012 marked an important anniversary of sorts...The one year anniversary of my stroke. We didn't really celebrate it outside of  ordering pizza. I find it hard to believe I have been off for a year
 Outside of my maternity leave with Emmy, I have never been off this long. I know I am not ready to go back to work as of yet - my Doctor just laughs when I bring it up, and I know there are still many hurdles to face.  An anniversary post wouldn't be complete without a comparison from where I was to where I am now.
One year ago I was  in the hospital, in the ICU, after originally losing the ability to speak, walk, to swallow it seems so long ago. I still remember laying in the ER and a nurse telling me to 'use my words' like I was a child. I was so angry at her, but it worked, my speech came back.   I wanted to punch her but as a medical professional, she was right and I thank her for it!
abilities one year ago- could not walk, talk, eat, pee on my own, brush my teeth, dress without difficulty, etc, basically I felt utterly hopeless, before I left the hospital, I was walking, talking, posting to Facebook, brushing my teeth, dressing myself (although still with issues) I  was discharged in time to watch my beloved Canucks lose in game 7 of the Stanley Cup. *sigh Despite that it was nice to be home.
Abilities 6 months ago- conquered the whole front back thing. It sounds easy but being newly brain damaged  made the simplest things so hard,Keith had to help me so many times underwear was a bugger! Keith cooked most meals, put my bra on for me daily,  did most everything and worked 40+ hours a week
Abilities now- I try to cook dinner
a few times a week, do laundry, load dishwasher, etc, My hands are the main issue-  have trouble folding opening mail,  writing and typing.   I can FINALLY  put in a bra and fully dress myself most days Unfortunately, there are the bad days and my fine motor skills are affected. However I am able to exercise my body and my brain which I feel was the factor in me putting my bra in for the first time by myself after the stroke, I pictured it, said to myself that I could do it and I did it. Beautiful feeling!!!!!! I take Emmy to school daily, and do my best to be the kind of Mom she deserves.  I still need to nap daily to be able to physically make it through most days, I get lonely but I try to reach out, I  have difficulty in busy, loud places, where many things are going on at once. I try to limit activities that fit that. I try to do the  grocery shopping, but need help as I still cannot work produce bags- Keith does that.  Basically I  do what I can and work on the on the rest. Every day there is a new challenge- it is my job to conquer all I can. Patience is a virtue I did not possess prior to this but as recovery is a slow process, I am getting better with it. I have days  where  I feel useless, and I have always been my own worst enemy so I try to remember  that it's okay to have bad days, but not to let them progress into bad weeks.I am human after all!