It has been over a year since I updated my blog, hopefully somebody will still look at it LOL! Keith bought me Dragon speak 12 as one of my Christmas presents so it should be a little easier for me to update... That is my hope anyways!!
A brief update about us Emerson is in grade 2 and enjoying it tremendously she's doing quite well. I am just chugging along on doing what I can.
In the coming weeks I will be updating this to catch you up on last year :-)
Showing posts with label all about me. Show all posts
Showing posts with label all about me. Show all posts
Thursday, December 26, 2013
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Happy Anniversary?
Tuesday, June 5, 2012 marked an important anniversary of sorts...The one year anniversary of my stroke. We didn't really celebrate it outside of ordering pizza. I find it hard to believe I have been off for a year
Outside of my maternity leave with Emmy, I have never been off this long. I know I am not ready to go back to work as of yet - my Doctor just laughs when I bring it up, and I know there are still many hurdles to face. An anniversary post wouldn't be complete without a comparison from where I was to where I am now.
One year ago I was in the hospital, in the ICU, after originally losing the ability to speak, walk, to swallow it seems so long ago. I still remember laying in the ER and a nurse telling me to 'use my words' like I was a child. I was so angry at her, but it worked, my speech came back. I wanted to punch her but as a medical professional, she was right and I thank her for it!
abilities one year ago- could not walk, talk, eat, pee on my own, brush my teeth, dress without difficulty, etc, basically I felt utterly hopeless, before I left the hospital, I was walking, talking, posting to Facebook, brushing my teeth, dressing myself (although still with issues) I was discharged in time to watch my beloved Canucks lose in game 7 of the Stanley Cup. *sigh Despite that it was nice to be home.
Abilities 6 months ago- conquered the whole front back thing. It sounds easy but being newly brain damaged made the simplest things so hard,Keith had to help me so many times underwear was a bugger! Keith cooked most meals, put my bra on for me daily, did most everything and worked 40+ hours a week
Abilities now- I try to cook dinner
a few times a week, do laundry, load dishwasher, etc, My hands are the main issue- have trouble folding opening mail, writing and typing. I can FINALLY put in a bra and fully dress myself most days Unfortunately, there are the bad days and my fine motor skills are affected. However I am able to exercise my body and my brain which I feel was the factor in me putting my bra in for the first time by myself after the stroke, I pictured it, said to myself that I could do it and I did it. Beautiful feeling!!!!!! I take Emmy to school daily, and do my best to be the kind of Mom she deserves. I still need to nap daily to be able to physically make it through most days, I get lonely but I try to reach out, I have difficulty in busy, loud places, where many things are going on at once. I try to limit activities that fit that. I try to do the grocery shopping, but need help as I still cannot work produce bags- Keith does that. Basically I do what I can and work on the on the rest. Every day there is a new challenge- it is my job to conquer all I can. Patience is a virtue I did not possess prior to this but as recovery is a slow process, I am getting better with it. I have days where I feel useless, and I have always been my own worst enemy so I try to remember that it's okay to have bad days, but not to let them progress into bad weeks.I am human after all!
Outside of my maternity leave with Emmy, I have never been off this long. I know I am not ready to go back to work as of yet - my Doctor just laughs when I bring it up, and I know there are still many hurdles to face. An anniversary post wouldn't be complete without a comparison from where I was to where I am now.
One year ago I was in the hospital, in the ICU, after originally losing the ability to speak, walk, to swallow it seems so long ago. I still remember laying in the ER and a nurse telling me to 'use my words' like I was a child. I was so angry at her, but it worked, my speech came back. I wanted to punch her but as a medical professional, she was right and I thank her for it!
abilities one year ago- could not walk, talk, eat, pee on my own, brush my teeth, dress without difficulty, etc, basically I felt utterly hopeless, before I left the hospital, I was walking, talking, posting to Facebook, brushing my teeth, dressing myself (although still with issues) I was discharged in time to watch my beloved Canucks lose in game 7 of the Stanley Cup. *sigh Despite that it was nice to be home.
Abilities 6 months ago- conquered the whole front back thing. It sounds easy but being newly brain damaged made the simplest things so hard,Keith had to help me so many times underwear was a bugger! Keith cooked most meals, put my bra on for me daily, did most everything and worked 40+ hours a week
Abilities now- I try to cook dinner
a few times a week, do laundry, load dishwasher, etc, My hands are the main issue- have trouble folding opening mail, writing and typing. I can FINALLY put in a bra and fully dress myself most days Unfortunately, there are the bad days and my fine motor skills are affected. However I am able to exercise my body and my brain which I feel was the factor in me putting my bra in for the first time by myself after the stroke, I pictured it, said to myself that I could do it and I did it. Beautiful feeling!!!!!! I take Emmy to school daily, and do my best to be the kind of Mom she deserves. I still need to nap daily to be able to physically make it through most days, I get lonely but I try to reach out, I have difficulty in busy, loud places, where many things are going on at once. I try to limit activities that fit that. I try to do the grocery shopping, but need help as I still cannot work produce bags- Keith does that. Basically I do what I can and work on the on the rest. Every day there is a new challenge- it is my job to conquer all I can. Patience is a virtue I did not possess prior to this but as recovery is a slow process, I am getting better with it. I have days where I feel useless, and I have always been my own worst enemy so I try to remember that it's okay to have bad days, but not to let them progress into bad weeks.I am human after all!
Saturday, October 08, 2011
Life since the stroke
I apologize for the lack of updates as I have been recovering from the stroke. I am currently still off workas I am continuing to work on my fine motor skills and they continue to improve. When I think back to where I was versus where I am today, well it is dramatic. I still have a long road ahead, but I am getting there. My left hand is still weak, I cannot tie my shoes, and I face challenges every.single.day. However bleak and depressing that sounds, I try to remember what I CAN do. As I am my own worst enemy, that in itselfcan be a challenge!LOL
As Emmy started school in September, on school days I get up, shower and get dressed. I make Em's lunch usually with assistance as spreading butter/jam etc is still a messy and difficult task. I drive Em to school and once home I am exhausted both physically and mentally. I usually have a short nap to help get through the day. In the PM I walk on the treadmill, balance & physio exercises. After that, I watch some Dr. Phil, pick up Emmy and figure out dinner. A day in my boring life. However I will take boring over the past 4.5 years of my life. A loss of a second trimester pregnancy, breaking my ankle, 2 seizures and now the stroke. I revel in boring, I rejoice in it. I have an appointment in Vancouver on November 03, and my hope is I will be cleared to return to work mid to late Nov if not sooner. However, that is up to the stoke specialist I will be seeing.
I still have many hurdles to get through and I don't want to set myself up for failure. So we will see what happens.
As Emmy started school in September, on school days I get up, shower and get dressed. I make Em's lunch usually with assistance as spreading butter/jam etc is still a messy and difficult task. I drive Em to school and once home I am exhausted both physically and mentally. I usually have a short nap to help get through the day. In the PM I walk on the treadmill, balance & physio exercises. After that, I watch some Dr. Phil, pick up Emmy and figure out dinner. A day in my boring life. However I will take boring over the past 4.5 years of my life. A loss of a second trimester pregnancy, breaking my ankle, 2 seizures and now the stroke. I revel in boring, I rejoice in it. I have an appointment in Vancouver on November 03, and my hope is I will be cleared to return to work mid to late Nov if not sooner. However, that is up to the stoke specialist I will be seeing.
I still have many hurdles to get through and I don't want to set myself up for failure. So we will see what happens.
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
The day Emerson saved my life
It has taken me over a month to write this post about the event that transpired on June 5,2011 due to a combination of time in the hospital, physical limitations and probably some mental blocks of not wanting to relive the experience. As it is good therapy to type, I shall give it a go.
It was a Monday, my EDO day. so Em and I were home together I had a Doctor's appointment in the morning, but chose to take her with me rather than drop her off at daycare We usually spend my EDO days together, so was not out of the ordinary by any means.
The day began normally. We went to my appointment which was quick as I was just refilling prescriptions.
I was feeling positively normal .We came home I noticed I was having trouble opening the front door, like my hands wouldn't work properly. I managed to get the door open, and Em and I went inside.
Once inside, I laid down on the couch as I suddenly felt overwhelmingly tired. Em went and played on my computer. A few minutes later, I tried to sit up to take a drink of water and I couldn't all of a sudden, I could hear myself making moaning noises and I was aware I was making them, but I could not control it. Em heard this and became quite panicked. I knew I needed help, and fast.I heard Em crying and saying over and over again that "Mommy was going to die" I wanted to comfort her. to tell her I was OK. I rolled off the couch to help but all that did was put me face down on the carpet. I still could only moan and make generally scary noises but Em, who now was asking me what she could do for me. I kept trying to say "phone but it was not intelligible, despite my efforts.Thankfully, she figured it out and she brought me a phone. I picked up the phone and managed to dial Keith's work, praying the girl answering would understand me.She answered, and I kept repeating Keith's name When he came on the line, I repeatedly said to "come home" until I knew heard he understood me.Keith was home within minutes and called 9-1-1
At this moment weeks later, we still have no diagnosis the working diagnosis is a stroke, but the head Neurologist , does not feel that is the case, rather a condition that mimics the signs of one was in hospital for 9 days had too many tests to count and I am on sick leave while we wait for more and a diagnosis I am slowly getting better, just taking it one day at a time. I Thank God that I kept Em home and that my 5 year old had the courage to help in what had to be the most terrifying of situations What if I Had sent Em to daycare? I would have been alone until 6PM My baby girl saved my life
***********Please forgive typo's am am just starting to be able to type and it is oh so slow
It was a Monday, my EDO day. so Em and I were home together I had a Doctor's appointment in the morning, but chose to take her with me rather than drop her off at daycare We usually spend my EDO days together, so was not out of the ordinary by any means.
The day began normally. We went to my appointment which was quick as I was just refilling prescriptions.
I was feeling positively normal .We came home I noticed I was having trouble opening the front door, like my hands wouldn't work properly. I managed to get the door open, and Em and I went inside.
Once inside, I laid down on the couch as I suddenly felt overwhelmingly tired. Em went and played on my computer. A few minutes later, I tried to sit up to take a drink of water and I couldn't all of a sudden, I could hear myself making moaning noises and I was aware I was making them, but I could not control it. Em heard this and became quite panicked. I knew I needed help, and fast.I heard Em crying and saying over and over again that "Mommy was going to die" I wanted to comfort her. to tell her I was OK. I rolled off the couch to help but all that did was put me face down on the carpet. I still could only moan and make generally scary noises but Em, who now was asking me what she could do for me. I kept trying to say "phone but it was not intelligible, despite my efforts.Thankfully, she figured it out and she brought me a phone. I picked up the phone and managed to dial Keith's work, praying the girl answering would understand me.She answered, and I kept repeating Keith's name When he came on the line, I repeatedly said to "come home" until I knew heard he understood me.Keith was home within minutes and called 9-1-1
At this moment weeks later, we still have no diagnosis the working diagnosis is a stroke, but the head Neurologist , does not feel that is the case, rather a condition that mimics the signs of one was in hospital for 9 days had too many tests to count and I am on sick leave while we wait for more and a diagnosis I am slowly getting better, just taking it one day at a time. I Thank God that I kept Em home and that my 5 year old had the courage to help in what had to be the most terrifying of situations What if I Had sent Em to daycare? I would have been alone until 6PM My baby girl saved my life
***********Please forgive typo's am am just starting to be able to type and it is oh so slow
Saturday, January 29, 2011
It's been waaaaaaaay too long!
If you are reading this, I am thankful for you, your patience and that you came to visit my blog. I am back and have a bunch of posts to make this weekend. Short update on us: We are all well, had a great Christmas and settling back into life. Em's 5th birthday is in less than a month, and next Wednesday, Keith will be registering her for Kindergarten for the fall. As I am on the tail end of the 6 month ban on driving which ends March 14, 2011 providing with God's Grace I don't have another seizure, it made more sense for him to do it. It has been a frustrating 6 months as I have been completely dependent upon others to get me from point A to B. There is really nothing within a decent walking distance and whenever I am home, Emmy is with me. Add in the fact it is winter in Northern British Columbia and that equals staying home LOTS.
So, Iam back and will be updating over the next few days with pics and more.
So, Iam back and will be updating over the next few days with pics and more.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Seizure # 2
Last Friday, I ended up in the ER again due to a seizure, and this time I KNOW I didn't take 2 of any pill.
I went to bed around 11 and woke up at 1sh not knowing who I was and Keith in front of me getting me ready. I again didn't know who he was, who I was or where I was. Worse this time, I cut my face open on the shelf beside my bed and needed stitches. So off I went to the ER where I was stitched up and released. I meet with the Neurologist again on the 8th and I am praying for some answers. As both have happened at night, how do I know it won't happen tonight?
Keith has been absolutely AMAZING when I know he is just as scared as I am.Emmy tells me daily to not get anymore scratches. I love my family :-)
I went to bed around 11 and woke up at 1sh not knowing who I was and Keith in front of me getting me ready. I again didn't know who he was, who I was or where I was. Worse this time, I cut my face open on the shelf beside my bed and needed stitches. So off I went to the ER where I was stitched up and released. I meet with the Neurologist again on the 8th and I am praying for some answers. As both have happened at night, how do I know it won't happen tonight?
Keith has been absolutely AMAZING when I know he is just as scared as I am.Emmy tells me daily to not get anymore scratches. I love my family :-)
Sunday, May 09, 2010
Happy Mother's Day 2010
Well, I didn't have breakfast in bed, and I was woken up by Keith telling Emmy to be quiet as I was trying to sleep, but it's all good. It's a beautiful, sunny day in Prince George and Em's cough seems to be a bit better. *side note she has been fighting a nasty cough and cold for a week. No fever, thankfully, but her cough made her sound like a 3-pack-a-day smoker, which I am guessing she is not!
Em brought home a gift from daycare on Friday and was so excited, she gave it to me that evening. I did try to have her wait, but I gave in to the pout.
Emmy's Mother's Day Gift
Keith's gift to me (with my permission as he still gets mocked for buying me a bathroom scale for my 36th birthday. It's an Elliptical machine to help me in my weight loss journey. I have been working out daily on the treadmill, but just testing this machine last night showed me it will help big time! (Keith put it together last night as well)
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So far it has been a good Mother's Day. I do get to treat myself to a Tim Horton's Ice Capp later on which will be sweet! (Part of my weight loss was trying to avoid the Iced Capp's but as I have not had one for a week, and have been under my calorie goal every day, and it's freaking MOTHER'S day, I deserve one! LOL
I want to wish all my fellow Mommies a wonderful Mother's Day. I know I am so blessed to have Emmy and I am forever grateful that I get to experience this amazing journey of motherhood.
Now if only the Canucks would pull their heads out of their asses and actually win tonight, I could count this as a perfect day.
Em brought home a gift from daycare on Friday and was so excited, she gave it to me that evening. I did try to have her wait, but I gave in to the pout.
Emmy's Mother's Day Gift
Keith's gift to me (with my permission as he still gets mocked for buying me a bathroom scale for my 36th birthday. It's an Elliptical machine to help me in my weight loss journey. I have been working out daily on the treadmill, but just testing this machine last night showed me it will help big time! (Keith put it together last night as well)
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So far it has been a good Mother's Day. I do get to treat myself to a Tim Horton's Ice Capp later on which will be sweet! (Part of my weight loss was trying to avoid the Iced Capp's but as I have not had one for a week, and have been under my calorie goal every day, and it's freaking MOTHER'S day, I deserve one! LOL
I want to wish all my fellow Mommies a wonderful Mother's Day. I know I am so blessed to have Emmy and I am forever grateful that I get to experience this amazing journey of motherhood.
Now if only the Canucks would pull their heads out of their asses and actually win tonight, I could count this as a perfect day.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Follow up with the Neurologist
On Thursday I had my follow up with the Neurologist from the March 5th issue. Coincidentally, I also received my $80 ambulance bill the same day. Fun stuff! My insurance will reimburse me, so not too worried about that one!
So, the consensus is that I had a seizure that morning, but she referred to it as a log named issue that I would need a degree to remember. The good news is it will clear up on its own and she doesn't believe I will have another . There is some swelling on my brain which I have to have another MRI to ensure it has cleared up. I gave some blood and I will wait to hear from her.
So, the consensus is that I had a seizure that morning, but she referred to it as a log named issue that I would need a degree to remember. The good news is it will clear up on its own and she doesn't believe I will have another . There is some swelling on my brain which I have to have another MRI to ensure it has cleared up. I gave some blood and I will wait to hear from her.
Monday, March 15, 2010
The one where I went to the hospital
March 5, 2010 was an interesting day. Highlights included being taken to the hospital via ambulance, with my naked, fat bootie hanging out.
I'll start at the beginning.
Thursday night, I was planning to start a new medication, so I took my usual evening med (a blood pressure pill) earlier than normal, as I planned to add in the new med later that evening.
Evening went normally. I remember this part particularly clearly. As I took my pill before bed, it clearly had 100 imprinted on it. Great, except my new med that I was supposed to be taking should have read 40 and seeing the 100 should have triggered something...like "HEY MORON THAT'S THE WRONG PILL!" Alas, if it had, we would have missed the fun ahead...
Fast forward to the next morning. I have absolutely no memory of this, but Keith tells me he heard a loud bang around 6 am (normal wake up time for me) Keith tells me that he came upstairs , and I was laying beside my bed and the wall. He assumed I fell out of bed. Worried that he couldn't wake me, he called 911. If he was thinking of my pride, and the Emergency workers vision, he may of wanted to throw my nightgown on me as I had taken it off as I slept as I kept getting tangled in it. So there I am, fat, naked and probably blinding those poor workers or causing some stress leave.I'll say Keith was probably not worried about that when he more concerned I wasn't conscious.
I came to at the hospital. The Ambulance worker was asking me questions like the date or my birth date, and I could not answer his questions.
Long story short - I was released that afternoon and I am currently undergoing testing to rule out a seizure and to confirm I just passed out due to taking 2 blood pressure pills by accident. I still have to have an MRI and then hopefully we will have answers.
Regardless, have learned two important lessons: 1) use my pill box so I know what I have taken. and 2) Don't take off my PJ's at night 'cause that's when your naked butt will be the focus of Emergency worker's nightmares.
I'll start at the beginning.
Thursday night, I was planning to start a new medication, so I took my usual evening med (a blood pressure pill) earlier than normal, as I planned to add in the new med later that evening.
Evening went normally. I remember this part particularly clearly. As I took my pill before bed, it clearly had 100 imprinted on it. Great, except my new med that I was supposed to be taking should have read 40 and seeing the 100 should have triggered something...like "HEY MORON THAT'S THE WRONG PILL!" Alas, if it had, we would have missed the fun ahead...
Fast forward to the next morning. I have absolutely no memory of this, but Keith tells me he heard a loud bang around 6 am (normal wake up time for me) Keith tells me that he came upstairs , and I was laying beside my bed and the wall. He assumed I fell out of bed. Worried that he couldn't wake me, he called 911. If he was thinking of my pride, and the Emergency workers vision, he may of wanted to throw my nightgown on me as I had taken it off as I slept as I kept getting tangled in it. So there I am, fat, naked and probably blinding those poor workers or causing some stress leave.I'll say Keith was probably not worried about that when he more concerned I wasn't conscious.
I came to at the hospital. The Ambulance worker was asking me questions like the date or my birth date, and I could not answer his questions.
Long story short - I was released that afternoon and I am currently undergoing testing to rule out a seizure and to confirm I just passed out due to taking 2 blood pressure pills by accident. I still have to have an MRI and then hopefully we will have answers.
Regardless, have learned two important lessons: 1) use my pill box so I know what I have taken. and 2) Don't take off my PJ's at night 'cause that's when your naked butt will be the focus of Emergency worker's nightmares.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Valentines Day 2010
Yesterday, Keith and I took Emmy to see Grandma, and ended up having a few hours Emmy-free as Grandma offered to watch Miss Emerson while we went shopping. Keith and I headed to Costco for a bit, and went for smorg. Emmy had a blast playing with Grandma and was even well-behaved. Grandma made it through Emmy's incessant barrage of questions without flinching! That takes some serious patience! :) If I haven't mentioned it, Emmy has hit the silence-is-not-golden-and-needs-to-be-filled-with-noise-at-all-times phase.It's fun stuff, I tell you! LOL
As annoying as it can be, she amazes me with what she comes up with and her skills at things. She was playing on my computer on Saturday night and without any bookmarks, found the site she plays on Keith's computer. How? I don't know...but she does.
Below is Emmy's picture for Keith and I for Valentines Day.
So, all in all, it was a nice day. Happy Valentines to you all :-)
Thursday, January 14, 2010
The toy from HELL...
I know it looks innocent enough, cute and fuzzy, but believe me, this toy was made in Hell. Or by someone who doesn't have kids. Or a job that you need to be awake for. Or just a vengeful sort that wanted revenge for the toys of the past.
Emmy does not play with this toy often. She has had it since her 3rd birthday As such, we have not had much experience with this toy.. This is important to note as it plays an important part in the upcoming events.
Last night, we saw this toy for the first time in months as Em had brought it downstairs and was playing with it. All was good.
I went to bed a few hours later and Emmy joined me, sleeping quite soundly beside me.
Then it started.
That toy began making noise when no one was near it, or touching it.
The first time it happened, I woke up to it, and not really conscious of what was going on, yelled out, "Emmy, stop playing with that toy and go to bed!"
(She was asleep beside me)
From that point forward, it seemed to make noise every hour or so. I did my best to ignore it but as any noise that occurs in the quiet of the night, it always wakes you.You may be wondering why I didn't get up and turn it off, or kick it, or do something to stop this psychotic piece of &@^$ stop making noise. Well, basically, I was not all that brilliant at 3 am with seriously interrupted sleep. Sad, but true.
At 6 am, I heard Keith fighting with it and eventually, he was able to turn it off. Too bad it was time to get up by then.
Moral of the story: Don't buy annoying toys.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
I have a plan...
Due to my emotions since December 30, 2009, when I found out about Michelle's passing, I never got around to listing my resolutions for 2010. My first one actually will help with the second one.
1. Eat less take-out.
2. Lose weight
3. Be more patient
We have gotten into a lazy habit around here with cooking. Keith comes home around 6:30 pm and then we do the 'dinner dance' aka the roundabout questions about what either of us want for dinner. This goes on for awhile and before you know it, we are ordering in or making mac and cheese because it is getting too late. So, starting this week, I am going to be organized. I have planned the meals out, we are about to go shopping, and each day will have the plan for dinner so there won't be a question.
You may wonder why it's taken me so long to come to this simple plan. Well, the main reason is I am a terrible cook. Not only am I a terrible cook, is that I really, really really don't enjoy cooking. I don't mean any disrespect by this but I learned from my mom, who was not a great cook. My father was the better cook out of the two of them, and neither actually 'taught' me anything - I was not allowed in the kitchen while they were cooking.
So I have learned some in these years but I am not a great cook by any means. I can cook the basics, the very boring basics, but my meal plans for the next two weeks include things I have been scared to try before. So, we will see how it goes. At the very least is that I am trying?
1. Eat less take-out.
2. Lose weight
3. Be more patient
We have gotten into a lazy habit around here with cooking. Keith comes home around 6:30 pm and then we do the 'dinner dance' aka the roundabout questions about what either of us want for dinner. This goes on for awhile and before you know it, we are ordering in or making mac and cheese because it is getting too late. So, starting this week, I am going to be organized. I have planned the meals out, we are about to go shopping, and each day will have the plan for dinner so there won't be a question.
You may wonder why it's taken me so long to come to this simple plan. Well, the main reason is I am a terrible cook. Not only am I a terrible cook, is that I really, really really don't enjoy cooking. I don't mean any disrespect by this but I learned from my mom, who was not a great cook. My father was the better cook out of the two of them, and neither actually 'taught' me anything - I was not allowed in the kitchen while they were cooking.
So I have learned some in these years but I am not a great cook by any means. I can cook the basics, the very boring basics, but my meal plans for the next two weeks include things I have been scared to try before. So, we will see how it goes. At the very least is that I am trying?
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Remembering Michelle Lang
What feels like a million years ago, I worked at a newspaper called The Prince George Free Press. During my time there as the office manager, I developed good friendships, a few that still exist to this day, despite the frequency that people tend to move on in the newspaper industry. During my time there I became acquainted with an intern reporter named Michelle Lang. She was beautiful, had a smile that could light up a room, bright and funny. Her dedication to work was phenomenal, as she was often working well after everyone else had left for the day. I tended to work a lot of overtime myself, so I often witnessed this dedication.
As time went on, we both moved on to new challenges and places. Last year, we caught up on Facebook and I was so happy to see her happy and thriving in Calgary.
On Monday afternoon, I was watching some mindless program( I am on holidays lol) and was somewhat dozing on the couch as Emmy was napping in the other room. I was somewhat aware of my program being interrupted by a breaking news report. A moment later, I was fully alert as the reported announced that a reporter had been killed in Afghanistan while covering the war for the Calgary Herald. The reporter said Michelle Lang was killed when a make-shift explosive device had exploded killing her and 4 soldiers. I ran to my computer, desperately hoping and praying that I had heard the name wrong, that it was another Michelle Lang, anything but what my gut was telling me was true. Unfortunately, my quest for proof that it was not her was unsuccessful. She had died earlier that day. Grief overwhelmed me and I cried, as I have many times since then as reports are frequent and always bring tears to my eyes.
I greive with her family and friends. I grieve with her fiancee. I grieve for the 4 soldiers lost in the same blast.
Rest in Peace, Michele. I will miss you. Heaven is just a bit brighter with your smiling face up there.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Happy Birthday to me...
Yesterday, October 23, marked my 36th birthday. It was a nice day at work, no bad phone calls,(always a plus) lots of"Happy Birthday's" from my coworkers and my Facebook wall was covered. Made a girl feel special. After picking up Emmy and waiting for Keith to get home, we went for dinner at Boston Pizza where Em was very well behaved. We had a lovely dinner, and then spent 30 minutes in the washroom as Emmy was fascinated with the automatic foamy hand soap dispenser. Poor Keith was probably thinking we had deserted him as his daughter was ensuring her hands were the cleanest in the world :).
We came home and Keith took Emmy into the kitchen where obviously he was trying to get her to do something as she was talking in her faux whisper..aka a loud whisper you can hear across the room but is super-cute as she is actually trying to be quiet.
Here is what she brought me:
I had to scan it because it is completely captures a 3 year old's artwork...or perhaps just my 3 year old's typical artwork, but I think it's just perfect. It's a moment in time.
After that, Keith surprised me with a Dairy Queen ice cream cake, which Emmy was EXTREMELY excited about. I am guessing we will be eating cake for a while as there is only the three of us. LOL
So, overall I am a year older, grateful for the time to spend with my loved ones, friends and maybe to have made the difference to a client or two.
We came home and Keith took Emmy into the kitchen where obviously he was trying to get her to do something as she was talking in her faux whisper..aka a loud whisper you can hear across the room but is super-cute as she is actually trying to be quiet.
Here is what she brought me:
I had to scan it because it is completely captures a 3 year old's artwork...or perhaps just my 3 year old's typical artwork, but I think it's just perfect. It's a moment in time.
After that, Keith surprised me with a Dairy Queen ice cream cake, which Emmy was EXTREMELY excited about. I am guessing we will be eating cake for a while as there is only the three of us. LOL
So, overall I am a year older, grateful for the time to spend with my loved ones, friends and maybe to have made the difference to a client or two.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Thankful...
I have much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving day...
I am thankful to God for the many blessings in my life, for the health and happiness of my family.
I am thankful for my family, for Keith and Emmy, and the joy they bring to each and every day.
I am thankful for my extended family, my brother, sister-in-law Julie, my niece Melissa and nephews Malcolm and Micah. Although I don't see them as often as I'd like, I am thankful for our relationship.
I am thankful for Keith's family, who have always made me feel included, cared for, and a part of the family.
I am thankful for my Aunts Anne and Trudy, who really have become closer thanks to the power of the internet. They both sent gifts for Emmy, despite never meeting her and really make me feel valued and that Emmy is part of their thoughts. Since my own parents have chosen to ignore their children/grandchildren, it makes it so valuable. Family is valuable.
I am thankful for my job, and the power I have to help people in need. At it's core, that is what I do. I remember telling a friend once that my job was what I dreamed to attain, and that was 5 years before I got the job. It truly is my dream job.
I am thankful for my friends, who despite my short-comings and screw-ups, still like me.
I know there are lurkers out there who never comment, it would warm my heart if you would tell me what you are thankful for.
I am thankful to God for the many blessings in my life, for the health and happiness of my family.
I am thankful for my family, for Keith and Emmy, and the joy they bring to each and every day.
I am thankful for my extended family, my brother, sister-in-law Julie, my niece Melissa and nephews Malcolm and Micah. Although I don't see them as often as I'd like, I am thankful for our relationship.
I am thankful for Keith's family, who have always made me feel included, cared for, and a part of the family.
I am thankful for my Aunts Anne and Trudy, who really have become closer thanks to the power of the internet. They both sent gifts for Emmy, despite never meeting her and really make me feel valued and that Emmy is part of their thoughts. Since my own parents have chosen to ignore their children/grandchildren, it makes it so valuable. Family is valuable.
I am thankful for my job, and the power I have to help people in need. At it's core, that is what I do. I remember telling a friend once that my job was what I dreamed to attain, and that was 5 years before I got the job. It truly is my dream job.
I am thankful for my friends, who despite my short-comings and screw-ups, still like me.
I know there are lurkers out there who never comment, it would warm my heart if you would tell me what you are thankful for.
Saturday, September 05, 2009
Excitement on Blair Crescent
We live in a nice, quiet crescent. We don't tend to get too much happening on our block...in fact, I think the last time there was any sort of emergency vehicle on my block was when I broke my ankle and and we had to call an ambulance. That caused all the neighbours to be abuzz for days.
Yesterday around 5pm, I had picked Em up from daycare and had pulled into my driveway as usual. I went to the backseat to unbuckle Emmy from the car seat and she started talking about a man. I didn't understand what she was saying, but unbeknownst to me, a man had walked up behind me as I was unbuckling her. When I stood up, I saw him, which gave me a fright as I didn't see him walk up or hear him for that matter. He was probably around 40-50, stocky build, 6' or so, with close shaved graying brown hair.
He had leaned over and was talking about my tires as he was touching them, referring to them as "heavy". It was quickly obvious that this guy was not all there...either off his meds or needs some new ones in a hurry. He was talking gibberish as I quickly ushered Emmy to the front door. I just knew that this guy was trouble and my first instinct was to protect my daughter and get her away from this guy.
He walked behind our carport as I was desperately praying that I could get the door open without dropping my keys for once. I kept telling him to go home and that my husband would be home in a few minutes (Keith was due home in about an hour). As I was opening the door, he reached into the carport and started touching Keith's spare tires that are in the corner, wrapped in plastic. Side note: Buddy?? What's with the fascination with the tires????
At this point, he started swearing and getting angry. I thankfully managed to open the door and get inside and lock it again.
I grabbed the cordless phone as I could still hear him ranting outside the door. I turned a movie on for Em as I called 911. I just lost it when the dispatcher answered and started crying. They took a description and dispatched police. I looked outside and he was pacing in the carport at this point. I looked again a few moments later and he was gone, or at least out of sight.
The cops found him still hanging around the house. Apparently, he is new to town and that was the third time he was picked up today. The cops kept taking him to the hospital, and they kept releasing him. (WTF???Buddy obviously needs help!) He also is known to be violent so the cops told me I did the right thing by calling.
So long story short (too late, I know!) he was on his way to talk to a mental heath social worker. Probably released 10 minutes later, but hopefully they dealt with him.
The good news? With all the stress I have had with Emmy not listening to me lately...she did exactly what I told her instantly as I tried to get her in the house. No back talk, no delaying. I asked, she did. Must have been my tone? Whatever it was, it worked.
Yesterday around 5pm, I had picked Em up from daycare and had pulled into my driveway as usual. I went to the backseat to unbuckle Emmy from the car seat and she started talking about a man. I didn't understand what she was saying, but unbeknownst to me, a man had walked up behind me as I was unbuckling her. When I stood up, I saw him, which gave me a fright as I didn't see him walk up or hear him for that matter. He was probably around 40-50, stocky build, 6' or so, with close shaved graying brown hair.
He had leaned over and was talking about my tires as he was touching them, referring to them as "heavy". It was quickly obvious that this guy was not all there...either off his meds or needs some new ones in a hurry. He was talking gibberish as I quickly ushered Emmy to the front door. I just knew that this guy was trouble and my first instinct was to protect my daughter and get her away from this guy.
He walked behind our carport as I was desperately praying that I could get the door open without dropping my keys for once. I kept telling him to go home and that my husband would be home in a few minutes (Keith was due home in about an hour). As I was opening the door, he reached into the carport and started touching Keith's spare tires that are in the corner, wrapped in plastic. Side note: Buddy?? What's with the fascination with the tires????
At this point, he started swearing and getting angry. I thankfully managed to open the door and get inside and lock it again.
I grabbed the cordless phone as I could still hear him ranting outside the door. I turned a movie on for Em as I called 911. I just lost it when the dispatcher answered and started crying. They took a description and dispatched police. I looked outside and he was pacing in the carport at this point. I looked again a few moments later and he was gone, or at least out of sight.
The cops found him still hanging around the house. Apparently, he is new to town and that was the third time he was picked up today. The cops kept taking him to the hospital, and they kept releasing him. (WTF???Buddy obviously needs help!) He also is known to be violent so the cops told me I did the right thing by calling.
So long story short (too late, I know!) he was on his way to talk to a mental heath social worker. Probably released 10 minutes later, but hopefully they dealt with him.
The good news? With all the stress I have had with Emmy not listening to me lately...she did exactly what I told her instantly as I tried to get her in the house. No back talk, no delaying. I asked, she did. Must have been my tone? Whatever it was, it worked.
Tuesday, June 02, 2009
I am thankful
for so many things in my life. Keith, Emmy, my friends, my family, my job - I know I have many blessings in my life. And I am grateful for each and every one of them.
Yesterday, as I was out on my lunch break, I narrowly missed hitting a truck that ran a stop sign. The driver was going so fast I didn't even see a license plate, let alone get it. I had to slam my brakes on so hard that I am sure I left rubber on the road.
If I was going any faster down Victoria Street, I don't know that I would be here to write this blog post. It was that close. Although I was doing under the speed limit at the time (the upcoming light was red} I would say he was going at least 70 KM/H.
So, I am thankful. thanking God for keeping me safe. I am sure Keith and Em appreciate it too :-)
Yesterday, as I was out on my lunch break, I narrowly missed hitting a truck that ran a stop sign. The driver was going so fast I didn't even see a license plate, let alone get it. I had to slam my brakes on so hard that I am sure I left rubber on the road.
If I was going any faster down Victoria Street, I don't know that I would be here to write this blog post. It was that close. Although I was doing under the speed limit at the time (the upcoming light was red} I would say he was going at least 70 KM/H.
So, I am thankful. thanking God for keeping me safe. I am sure Keith and Em appreciate it too :-)
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Baby Talk
I often get asked if (and when) I am going to have another child. I often (and by often I mean about 50 times per day) think about it and weigh the pro's and con's. Invariably, the conversation turns to Maddie and that is the selling point. If someone could guarantee me that should I get pregnant, I would get to hold a living, breathing baby at the end of my pregnancy, I would go drag Keith's butt inside and get to work on it.
However, as you all know, no one can do that. So, instead I toss and turn about it.
The Pro's
A baby
A sibling for Emmy to grow up with
A baby
Con's
The chance of repeating the pain I felt at Maddie's passing.
I am 35, which means that whole "Advanced Maternal Age" thing which basically means higher risk, which I would be anyhow because of Maddie.
I know that my baby ache is amplified as I have a pregnant coworker who is absolutely adorable with her belly(she is due in June).
I would love to get pregnant tomorrow. However, I need to lose weight and I need to have my blood pressure meds changed to something that is safe in pregnancy. My hope is that by losing weight, I can get off the meds as my blood pressure spiked in pregnancy with Maddie and after I broke my ankle when I gained way too much weight. However, the weight loss is slow.
So, the final word on the subject? Yes, I want another child, my body aches to feel a baby move again, however...
However, as you all know, no one can do that. So, instead I toss and turn about it.
The Pro's
A baby
A sibling for Emmy to grow up with
A baby
Con's
The chance of repeating the pain I felt at Maddie's passing.
I am 35, which means that whole "Advanced Maternal Age" thing which basically means higher risk, which I would be anyhow because of Maddie.
I know that my baby ache is amplified as I have a pregnant coworker who is absolutely adorable with her belly(she is due in June).
I would love to get pregnant tomorrow. However, I need to lose weight and I need to have my blood pressure meds changed to something that is safe in pregnancy. My hope is that by losing weight, I can get off the meds as my blood pressure spiked in pregnancy with Maddie and after I broke my ankle when I gained way too much weight. However, the weight loss is slow.
So, the final word on the subject? Yes, I want another child, my body aches to feel a baby move again, however...
Saturday, April 04, 2009
I think they call it quirky
As Em was napping today, I played Monopoly on the computer. You know, 'cause the house cleans itself.
As I kicked the computer player's asses, I actually felt bad for them.
I felt bad for a computer generated player. There must be something wrong with me.
As I kicked the computer player's asses, I actually felt bad for them.
I felt bad for a computer generated player. There must be something wrong with me.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Excuses, excuses
I have been bad these past few weeks about posting. I have some good excuses, though.
- Two weeks ago, my car died, so we have been a 'happy' carpooling family in Keith's truck (which is a pig on gas)
- After Em was sick, I got it and her 4 hour illness took me 2 weeks to recover from.
- It was my 35th birthday yesterday. Oh that still looks wrong. I am officially closer to 40 than 30. Oh. and Keith bought me a bathroom scale. 'Cause I didn't know how fat I was. Good choice, buddy, good choice.
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