"Woof Woof"

said Em today to the dog she could not see, but could hear. Yahoo! We have an animal sound, could I get back that 18 month old questionairre I had to fill out yesterday, 'cause I need to check that off.

However, I missed this milestone, as I was at work. I've failed as a Mom again. Sheesh. At least Keith heard it.

Speaking of the 'questionairre', this was a 10 page quiz on whether your kid is hopelessly behind or not that we had to fill out at Em's 18 month shots appointment yesterday. I seem to remember ticking more "yes, she does this" than "no, my kid doesn't even attempt this" so that's gotta mean something. They also let me take her home, so that must mean I haven't messed her up developmentally so far. LOL

What Em doesn't do that she 'should be' (according to the experts:
She should be able to name a body part. I've gotten her to point to her belly button once when I asked her too. Personally, I think it was fluke and she just happened to see her belly button and said, "ooooooh what's that????". We work on this everyday, but the best I can get are giggles.

She should have 8 words outside of "Mom" and "Dad". She has more than that, but she doesn't use all of them consistently and I still have trouble understanding 60% of what she says. She has at least 2-2 word phrases as well ("What's that?" and "Whose there?" The nurse didn't seem concerned, however she also gave Em both her shots in the arm rather than one in the arm and one in the leg like she was supposed to, so I'm not sure I trust her opinion.

Pretty much everything else she did...that's all that stood out to me. So, we'll continue naming body parts and one day she will say, "Dude! That's my belly button!" and I can lay off of the body part naming and get started on Algebra.

The shots went as well as could be expected. Em bellowed, Mom teared up and Dad looked like he was gonna cry (it was his first shot appointment, his verdict was "That's just not right!") However, no more shots till she's 5. Yahoo!

You know you are a parent when...

you give up the couch so your kid can sleep.

Yes, another Keith and Emmy sleeping picture...I am surprised I have so many since she doesn't sleep very much anymore! LOL

Keith got up with her last night at 1 (since he is on holidays and I have to work today) and this is what I found when I came downstairs this morning.

The calm before the storm...

It's so quiet right now. Em is napping, Keith is fiddling with the TV (but the sound is off) and the only noise noticeable is my clattering on the keyboard. However, I know it will be short-lived...

It's SHOT DAY! Luckily, the last ones for awhile, but still. Em usually takes them like a pro, but we have 2 appointments with daycares tonight, so Murphy's Law may prevail.

No reason for the photo, but this is how I found Em and Keith the other day...say awwww now...

Hip-Check 2007

It's hard to believe it's been a whole year since Em was last seen by her orthopedic surgeon. We went today for the all-mighty hip check up which was LOADS of fun. Loads.

We got to the hospital and I plugged the meter to last until 10 am. Pleeeeeeeeenty of time. Right? Wrong.

Xray first. Em moved right when they took the picture so I KNEW it wouldn't be good but the tech checked it and said it was fine. Riiiiight.

We waited an extraordinary long wait when you have a restless toddler who is a bit pissed with you about holding her down on a gurney. How long, you ask? It was 10:30 AM before we even saw a doctor. For those who are keeping track at home , that would be 2 hours, 20 minutes PAST her scheduled appointment time. 140 minutes of desperately trying to keep Em amused without any of her favorite toys (they are all loud and annoying and I'm sure the waiting room didn't need to hear Ernie giggle 'oh that tickles' 5,000 times) 8,400 seconds of attempting to keep my curious daughter somewhere in the vicinity of me, and not have her scream like I was abducting her when I kept her from running away. Fun times, I tell you, fun times.

We finally got in to the exam room and Ms. Student Doctor comes in. Now, I know she needs practical experience to learn, but my kid is already pissy...must we piss her off more so Ms. Student Doctor can put a tick next to the "manually manipulated a toddler's hips". Oh, and Ms. Student Doctor forgot to read the part that you never, ever, ever pull hip babies by their feet down a bed (to bring them closer). I should fax her that info.

Em's orthopedic surgeon comes in and started telling me how pretty Em was. Good doctor. My child chose to take this opportunity to pick her nose. At least we won't have to worry about dating if she keeps that up.

Em receives her 4,000th compliment on the cute pink shoes I bought her the other day. They are really cute, but completely off topic.

After 2.4 seconds of examining her, the doctor says, "We just need a better Xray, the one from this morning is blurry, like she moved". Oh really? What a freaking shock.

Back we go to Xray. 30 minutes later, we've got 2 adults holding Em down so she'll be still. Again, fun times as my toddler screams in defiance.

Back to the doctor. Finally, a verdict. Well, a confusing one. Overall, he's happy with her hips, they haven't deteriorated too much, but there is something he's not happy with. He never actually specifies what this is but wants us back in 6 months for another round of Xrays. Yahoo.

We left the hospital at 11:10 AM. 3 hours after her 'appointment time'. LOL Luckily, no ticket on my car. Because that, my friends, would have made me cranky.

Pet Peeve #40039384

When parents let their children run all over a store, unsupervised. Why do they do it? So they can shop in peace, of course. Yet, every other shopper is dodging the kids screaming accross the store to each other and running all over the place. Glad to know the parents got to shop in peace.

I just got back from Walmart, can you tell? LOL

Completely unrelated to my last post

Yesterday at work, someone advertised (I work for a free classified publication) a "Surrey with a fringe on top". Once I stopped giggling, I realized he was serious. Yesterday, I learned what a Surrey with a fringe on top was. Oops! LOL (In my defence in the 2 weeks I've been employed, there's been a few weird ads, and at least one pickup attempt. I thought the guy was referring to the song and being funny! lol)

Oh, and someone else called in an ad to trade a left roller blade for a left hockey skate. Size 9.5 prefered. Apparently, someone stole his hockey skate and left the roller blade. Seriously? Is ther someone out there with one roller blade on and one ice skate? Just commit already, one or the other! LOL

Random things...

Vertigo - since giving up ALL caffeine (not just Coke) last Saturday, I've only had 2 minor Vertigo experiences. Both happened at work, but they were mild enough that I could take a Benadryl and wait them out. Nothing like the "room spinning, can't walk, must crawl to couch and get a bucket" experiences like I was having. I haven't been taking the daily Benadryl either, so I am excited by this development. Well, as excited as a sleep-deprived mom can be without caffeine! I truly hope it continues as I was getting so frustrated with working with Vertigo (never knowing when it would hit, etc)

I work 3 full days next week. 8:30 am to 3:30 pm. Okay, not really full days, but read my above paragraph about being tired and you'll realize why this could be hard. Em is being watched by her Daddy for the next two weeks, and I will be sure to take Em's codeine meds with me so Dad can't use them to get a longer nap out of her! (okay, so I really don't think he would do that...at least he better not consider it!)

I spoke to my Mom last night for the first time in 9 months. Sadly, I realized that in the 9 months, nothing has changed. She is still the same, and is still trying to manipulate and con. I told her about Maddie when I was giving her crap about not even attempting to contact me...she didn't even know I was pregnant.
Our conversation about Maddie went like this:

Me: You know what Mom? It would have been nice to have a card from you to put in Em's baby book to recognize her first birthday. It would have been something, an effort on your part to recognize that she is your grandchild. Would have cost less than $2. How about her first Christmas? You missed that too, and you were IN PRINCE GEORGE. . There is not a single picture of you with your grandchild. Not one. You've seen her twice in 18 months, and the last 9 months, you've been gone. The only reason we are talking now is because I picked up the phone.
Mom: tries to apologize, blames it on Dad. Makes a joke, "So, did you have a baby in the 9 months we've been gone?"
Me: (Wrong thing to joke about to me) Actually, I did Mom. I was pregnant when you were here in December. Do you remember me being sick? That's why. The baby died. I delivered my daughter, and she was dead.
Mom: Oh, don't joke about things like that, Jan (says the woman who lied to us about having cancer for 5+ months)
Me: I'm not joking, Mom. Her name was Madison Kate, and she was born on March 6, 2007 at 5:55 am. If you had even attempted to be a part of our lives, you would have known this. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to face and I couldn't turn to my own Mom. Why? Because my Mom didn't care enough about us to give us an address, or even a phone number. Because my mom made us (meaning my brother and I) out to be the bad guys.
Mom: *mumbles*

I don't know what I was expecting out of her, but I felt better that I got to say those things that were bothering me for months. Was I hurtful? Probably. Was I wrong? I don't think so. I don't like airing my family's dirty laundry to the Blogger world, but I could have been more harsh to her and it wouldn't even compare to the last 5 years and what they have pulled on the family.

Keith actually said to me last night that he was sorry. I asked him why. He replied "Because the Mom you are looking for, the Mom you need isn't there. Unless she has an epiphany on her deathbed, she never will be. And I'm sorry for that."

He's right. I've always sought out a Mom that wasn't there. This is not a new thing, she's never been there. I've always been the fat daughter, the not perfect daughter, the daughter who resembled her father much to her Mom's very vocal dismay, the not petite daughter. I still have never heard that my parent's are proud of me.

My name is Jan, and I have Mommy issues.

Holy Rash, Batman!

My poor, poor Emmy. I've spoken about the fact that she tends to rash pretty easily, however yesterday was a new record.

The day started fine...her bum wasn't red at all when Keith changed her in the morning. I changed her at 10 am before going to get the sitter and she was fine. She had a slight diaper rash the previous day so I was pleased that it was all cleared up.

I went to work at noon as usual these days. Em seemed fine when I left her. At 3:45 (15 minutes before I was off) I get a call at work. I knew it was the sitter before I picked it up as she's the only one who would call me there. As soon as I picked up, I could hear Em wailing in the background. She explained that Em has been crying for the past hour. Since I'm a big baby, that instantly made me want to cry. I got all choked up and told her I would be home in 5 minutes. (Thanks work for understanding!)

I rushed home and could hear Em from outside. I got inside and she was hysterical. The first thing I noticed was that she was poopy, so I asked the sitter if she had checked her diaper recently. She said she just changed her 1/2 an hour before she started crying, and it had been poopy (but not rashy).

I put screaming Em down to change the diaper, and quickly I noticed that she was all rashed up. I went to the sink to rinse her rather than use a wipe, and as I rinsed her with cool water, she screamed like I was dousing her with boiling hot water. It was CRAZY!! She was SO upset and my heart was breaking for her.

Once clean, I brought her back to the living room and laid her on the couch, diaper-less. The ceiling fan was blowing on her, and she calmed down. I inspected the rash at this point and noticed it was actually blistering (think water blisterd when you burn) all along the sides of her foo-foo, and the rest was red from rash. Damn, that would make ME cry too, let alone a toddler!

I quickly determined that it was the two poops in a row that did it, and the second one was highly acidic obviously. I ended up taking her to the walk-in clinic just so a Doctor could see the blistering (I had never seen it before). Em screamed the whole time in the clinic, bless that Doctor for being so patient with us!

The verdict was nasty diaper rash caused by contact, which I knew any how. He prescribed a special cream to use and some Tylonel with codeine for Em. Now, I'm not an advocate of drugging your baby, but hot damn, this stuff works. I gave her the lowest dose listed and she slept from 7:30pm-7:30am. She would have slept even longer, but I went in when I heard her stirring. She went to sleep without her last bottle, slept through me undoing her diaper and spreading the cream on her (I had to pick it up later as they had to make it), she slept through a 4 hour thunderstorm that rocked the house and rattled the windows. She slept like she was back in her Harness, with her legs spread and bent, in her frog-leg pose. The kid didn't stir till this morning, and she hasn't slept through the night for the past two weeks. Keith says these are the best drugs ever. Silly man. Although I am tempted to agree with him. LOL

The rash is nasty looking this morning, and I'm not sure how she'll do with the sitter, but it's just 4 more hours and then I'm home for the weekend.

On another note, the job is getting better. The first week was hard and I felt so dumb...just out of it.

And here, for the fun of it, is a completely unrelated picture of Emmy, looking like she's calling me Cuckoo...maybe she's on to something! LOL

How I know I'm a Mom, reason 5,000,0000

As I was selecting music for my skookum 10 CD changer, half of the music selected was my preference...the other half was Emmy's. Apparently, Keith has no say. LOL


My name is Jan, and I'll be the one doing the hokey pokey on the way to dropping Em off at daycare.

My days as a SAHM are numbered...

And that number is 2. I go to work Tuesday afternoon. I have many, many mixed feelings about this. I am so sad about leaving Em, and yet there is a tiny part that is a bit excited about the opportunity.

August is the trial month. If I don't like it, or if Em has trouble adjusting...I will not continue. She is my first and ultimate priority. Financially, we are making ends meet right now, but it's always tight (like fish patties tight). This will give us some breathing room and maybe allow a splurge here or there. We'll see.

August is also the month of Em's follow up with the Orthopedic Surgeon. I believe her hips are fine, but the X-Rays will tell us for sure. It is also the month for shots and the follow up MMR vaccination. I am dreading that one since she had such a reaction at 12 months. (See picture below)